Hillarous Court Cases

Last one is too good.These are from a book called "Disorder in the Court." These are thingspeople actually said in court, word for word, taken down and nowpublished by court reporters - who had the torment of staying calm whilethese exchanges were actually taking place.Q: What is your date of birth?A: July fifteenth.Q: What year?A: Every year.
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Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke upthat morning?A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"Q: And why did that upset you?A: My name is Susan.
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Q: And where was the location of the accident?A: Approximately milepost 499.Q: And where is milepost 499?A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500.
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Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, hedoesn't know about it until the next morning?____________________________________________________________________
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?____________________________________________________________________
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?A: Yes.Q: And what were you doing at that time?___________________________________________________________________
Q: She had three children, right?A: Yes.Q: How many were boys?A: None.Q: Were there any girls?____________________________________________________________________
Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?A: Yes.Q: And these stairs... did they go up also?___________________________________________________________________
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?A: By death.Q: And by whose death was it terminated?___________________________________________________________________
Q: Can you describe the individual?A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male or a female?____________________________________________________________________
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
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Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
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Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?A: No.Q: Did you check for blood pressure?A: No.Q: Did you check for breathing?A: No.Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began theautopsy?A: No.Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law